When I escape

Knots in the throat
At the point of overwhelm
And when I should be crying out
I am programmed to go quiet

Being vocal about my feelings and needs
Is not something that is easy for me
Let alone realising it internally for myself...

Krishna
I rely on him to show me the mirror
When I evade seeing my own truth
Krishna
The one who makes it easy
For me to face the crux of matters
And thus be released from their choking grip
Krishna
The one I believe sees without needing to be shown
The one who listens without needing to be told
The one who shows up without me even knowing I wanted somebody to...

Oh how then can I seek this in a person
When I myself am unable to be so
What then do I seek from a person
When I wish to connect with them
Who then may I be
When I choose to be with another
Why then do I yearn to be with
When I know its improbabilities
Where then do I draw the line
When I seek to know another
When then do I stop
When I come upon a block...

Questions
With no readymade answers
And this is why I gotta live them
That I may know
And perhaps discover a world real
Beyond the limits of my imagination...

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