Why Ma?



Why o why Ma?
What have I done to deserve your ire?
Why do you direct your frustration with the men at me?
You don't let your blind love allow you to express where you must
And instead you rain it all at me?

Why o why Ma?
What have I not done to deserve your poison?
Why can I not see that it is not me but you?
You don't want to see the truth because you have nothing else to rely on then
And instead you continue to berate me?

Why o why Ma?
Do I have to take your crip?
It's not your fault Ma.
It's mine. Because I listen and they don't.
If only you would see, things would be so free
But you keep trying hard to fit yourself in their mould
While I encourage you to let your own flow
Yes, it is my fault
That I don't see
How conniving the drama of this world can be
Yes, it is my fault
That I don't leave
However poisonous the blindness makes it all to be
Yes, it is my fault
That I forget
How I never belonged to this side of the world
Yes, it is my fault
That I don't know where to stop
How I still have faith that the curtains will fall and the joy of truth will be revealed
This world is unfair Ma,
Not because of what it is
But because of how you sieve it differently for them and for me
You are amazing Ma
When I am here at all moments
But the moment I venture out wanting to make something of me
You treat me differently
Your rage comes firing at me
And like a helpless cub
I know naught how to deal it
If I could either..

But I am glad ma
To not feel the heartbreak because the heart has opened into a world wide and free
And such foibles even if they come, a-moment after they pass as easily
How fortunate Ma
That your daughter has been found
In the god you try so hard to appease
When all you need is a look in and around your own self at ease
How fortunate Ma
That your daughter will not let herself be found wanting like you
In the society you try so hard to fit in
When all you need is a gentle acknowledgement in your own for the truth it speaks
How fortunate Ma
That your daughter never belonged
In the world of crafty veiled appeasements
When all you need is an honest presence with whatever it may be lovingly held in calming ease

Why o why Ma?
Then you try again
To patch up what may never mend
Because what needs mending never existed
As we belong to worlds that never met
But we meet
Daily day after day
And this may go on for eternity
How then must we be?

Universe, I ask you in a humble plea~

O Universe, I now see
The fault is not hers or of me
We just live in a world run by men visibly
While women keep it going invisibly
And the children suffer the trauma of this gap miserably
O Universe, talking it out it helped
But you see, this could again go on for eternity
Crip and talk and crip back again
Grow beyond this anonymity
O how do we?

Universe, I ask you again in humble plea~







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