Vincent Van Gogh- Another awesome human being who I knew little of, (Another apart from Michelagnolo (and many many others I've got acquainted with in my life)- I'd suggest reading this post first, you may choose to continue though- your wish) in fact heard of him only in college without understanding anything-I only knew there once existed an eccentric painter by that name with jazz paintings in some period of time! Ha how I now laugh at my ignorance of that time! 

One fine day towards the end of my 4th year at college, our desks were going to be shifted and we were asked to clear our lockers if we didn't want to lose our stuff. Now, I had found this book in my locker few months ago, perhaps a senior's (haven't yet found who it belongs to and ofcourse there's no name written on it if you wondered) No, it wasn't Michelangelo's biography but Vincent's (You sure guessed that didn't ye?! Awesome!) biography called- "Lust for Life". Yes, written by the very same Irving Stone- Gotta love this fellow! Thanks a million for these gems!

Now I didn't know who it belonged to, and I didn't by any means want it to be dumped anywhere without a care! So, the only option was to take it into my custody! You sure do know how I love books!?! I believe they love me too hehe! So yeah, I took it home and it became a part of my family of books in my cupboard (Someday, I'll build a home worthy of them. I know they know this haha so they put up with me as of now-Thank you!)

So, it gradually got acquainted and adjusted with its new home while I went on with my flow. I used to look at it at times and wonder when would I read it- I'd picked it once or twice and began reading but never got through few pages- something or the other got in the way or another book grabbed my attention.

One fine day, this one caught my attention like there was nothing else to do but read it NOW! I knew the time had come for a conversation with the new member! So there started this journey of great great emotion and adventure through the life of this delicate and passionate human being Vincent- his life, his love for humanity, his ventures and how he started painting, how he was misunderstood by the public but thankfully appreciated by his artist friends and his relationship with his brother-the only person who loved and understood him (Thank goodness for Theo!) There couldn't have been a more perfect time for me to have read this book! It found me right when even I didn't know I needed it!

Those were dark days for me full of doubt and questions where this came like a guiding light that started me off on an adventure so magical that I can only thank the Universe! Of course I also send many thanks to the previous caretaker of the book who left it in that locker that happened to be mine! Magic! Do you see the magic, the happenings of events so random and so strange, yet full of meaning and full of the right gifts from the Universe reaching you at the right time, rather the right state of mind?
I can see now that had I read Vincent's story at any state of mind, I wouldn't have understood or loved it as much as I do now.

Since, I loved this sooo very much, I looked up other books by the same author and found Michelangelo to be someone I'd like to know! So, I managed to take custody of The Agony and the Ecstasy through the coupons the college so kindly presents students with to appreciate their effort-Even I earned a few. I'm telling you, even this is part of the magical plan the Universe seems to have an inkling of!  

Ok now why did I love Lust for Life soooo much?-here's a secret- it's the first book that extracted H2O from my windows- Alright, the first book that got me teary-eyed! FIRST BOOK! Can you imagine the joy and confusion of that moment? I'd never thought of myself an emotional person, in fact I didn't even remember the last time I'd cried! And here, this feller just by being who he was- by having the courage to follow his dream and his love of life so beautifully composed by Irving- did the deemed impossible feat- Just like that! I was glad, because I saw myself in his life too, and rejoiced that I had a friend who'd understand and also felt sad that I wasn't there for him then! Perhaps I was- who knows? 

Anyway, this episode was just the real beginning of an understanding of who I was and what I had been doing all this while in my life- Hiding! I see that now- I had difficulty in expressing my thoughts and feelings(Yay! So I did have feelings afterall!) only because I had suppressed them all my life because I didn't know how to express and I found excuses that nobody will understand or they'll make fun of me- not entirely baseless excuses but that means I'd let few earlier embarrassing and hurtful silly incidents of my life plug myself in(Not any longer! I found those locks and released them with the key of forgiveness! I also had to forgive my self(more difficult to recognise but it's possible and true) for allowing such silly things to dampen my spirit which got me nothing but self-imagined illusory pain and darkness)

Perhaps if I hadn't spend so many years locked up within, I wouldn't have known the richness and joy of the inner world?! I see the journey began that day with the book, with the first rain washing the dust off my home, gradually opening my doors and windows that I didn't know existed, that I'd forgotten I'd closed myself, spaces I am still discovering while thanking each new key that is sent by the Universe-music, movie, books; most importantly People!- all these magical wonders that came at the right moment when as if  they knew I'd welcome them and understand their true worth?! Haha perhaps like Nanny McPhee who comes when she's needed and not when she's wanted! Hehe I'm as glad as I can be and it makes me happier to be able to share this with you- even I wish to be a medium for the Universe to reach out to those in need, to you ?!

Perhaps, you reading this post right now has some magic awaiting you? Perhaps not. That'd be your adventure with its own treasure hunt! This might just be a clue or perhaps an apparent obstruction? You decide! Are you on your treasure hunt for the keys? Are you willing to start the hunt, be more aware and open-minded just like a detective, receptive to the Universe? Come on! Believe me, if any part of what I've been talking about has got you excited even a bit, I assure you-you are in for a magical ride! If not, then perhaps your key lies elsewhere- You can't escape the magic! (Why would you want to?) It'll find you fret not! And for sure- Fear not! 'I am there' Maybe later some day you'll stumble in here and smile a smile of understanding! Don't forget to say hello!


His father called him Michelagnolo lovingly, rarely. Yes, I'm talking about Michelangelo. Michelagnolo di Lodovico Buonarroti Simoni. (I crosschecked with googly-yes! I remember! I like remembering things I love-Don't ye too?) You must've heard his name even if fleetingly, in those history books in school eh? Probably you don't even remember. 'Renaissance' - ring a bell? Never mind. Actually, I don't blame you if you didn't give a shit- it's not your fault. But now, you sure can choose to!

You must be wondering what's gotten into me and what's this tone of talking I've adopted?! Haha well, I'll clear the fog a bit- Up until now even for me, Michelangelo was just a name associated with some great work he'd done. That's it- what work, why and how and even when? I don't recall and didn't bother either. History in school had been one of the most haunting subjects for me! I never could understand why I had to mug up the dates and names of heroes and places so remote in time and space- I never could relate at any level to anything. Perhaps you were luckier than me if you had a passionate teacher who made it interesting for you and contextualised it so you could relate in some way at some level and grasp the stories and the people in your imagination. Yes, it is important to have an open-minded passionate teacher for any subject who through his/her own imagination and readiness to learn AND share, instills that joy of learning in the student too- the rest is ofcourse upto the student how receptive he/she wishes to be of the treasure available to her/him (Yeah, I interchanged the gender on purpose. That shows that you ARE paying attention. You sure are smart and ofcourse thanks!)

So, listen to history = his story = the story of the Universe, of man, of God?
Ok, I got carried away with the word 'history'- You know words have some inherent truths in them! Most of them!(Probably all of them?) It's fun to play with words and once you start this journey of wordtruths, things seem much more richer and laden with meaning and it's great fun too! Also, you then start using words carefully and hunt for words to better express yourself or invent new ones! There- You've got a treasure hunt right there with endless treasure to seek and find!
I digress.

Getting back, yes- so I never thought I'd ever be interested in history- though the idea of archaeology was fascinating-an adventure! Who doesn't like an adventure? Well, by now you must surely have guessed and even getting impatient to know what this post is all about? How does Michelangelo figure here? What am I ranting about? What's the point? Why? Why Why? Hehe patience my friend!

There's one thing you must know about me- How I despise the way Education today has majorly become nothing more than feeding facts, testing rote-learning skills, judging and comparing individuals by 'marks' attained on totally irrelevant 'exams' to test the memory skills (I'm getting furious here.) I'll save the fury for some other day when I'll talk about this in greater detail and also give you a balm in the form of my vision for Education as it should be and as it will be- A place for each individual to blossom irrespective of anything. A place where you will be recognised and respected for who you are and who you want to be and who you can become! Ok, I'm giving away too much. Michelagnolo's getting impatient now haha!

So, yes, I love history now. Why? Because I see stories now- of human beings, of their lives- their dreams, passions, fears, emotions, pains, loves - And how the tide of events shaped them and how they shaped the events around them. Human beings just like you and me- Imagine! With unique bodies, minds and souls like no other and yet we find so many similarities! Doesn't it give you faith and courage in yourself? It sure does to me! Until now, all those historical figures and events were empty for me- images with no content but now as I am gradually getting more and more aware I see me somewhere in there, in fact everywhere- I feel the Universal connection beyond time and space yet so rooted in time and space- Funny eh? Isn't it beautiful?

"Teach me history as a lesson of mankind's humanity please." - Serena Fernandes (An awesome individual  who defines undefinable friendship for me)
Spot on! I don't want to merely know what you did. I wish to know what you were thinking and feeling too!
And what better way to know the history than through the eyes of people who lived in those times? Yes, I'm talking about biographies - I'd always thought such accounts would be so boring but I know now that they are as gripping as any fiction, in fact even more awesome just because they have been true experiences! And if someone like Irving Stone has written it, you cannot deny the pleasure of reading the wonderful loving manner in which he respectfully and truthfully captures the character of the person and the era! What's best is that a biography is written after years of research and reading of lots and lots of material( the bibliography speaks volumes) on that person and presented to us so readily with the life-story of a human being just like a  novel, albeit a real story! Imagine- from all those texts?!

Perhaps, you are not understanding any of this- Fret not I say! Even I wouldn't have understood (forget even talking about it like this) a few years back, in fact probably even yesterday it might have eluded me. Here I must make clear to you that whatever I've said here or ever before and even in the future- I can't call it my own because I am aware and very grateful to all those others who have inspired me with their thoughts and stories until now and helped me express my own thoughts and ideas! I'd like to name the sources, I try to remember but I know I can't cover the ones who unconsciously influenced and directed me so I send my thanks to the Universe- I trust it to send these loving energies to all of them, even you perhaps because I know that it sees everything!

(In case you are wondering, I prefer saying Universe rather than God. Somehow when I say God, I imagine many of you to visualise religion and the question pops- which God you believe in? Isn't God one? Universe is God. God is everywhere right? Universe is everywhere too! It's everything- you, me, everything around us even things we haven't seen! Isn't it awesome?! I like thinking that the Universe is the source and that source could be you too! I am only a medium just as you, channeling the energy!)

Believe me, if you have got excited at any spot until here (ofcourse since you cared to pursue and reach here) I guarantee you- Some day you will be writing about your own experience which many others will read and that day even you will assure them- Worry not, You shall see! Or maybe you will express through another medium- art, music, movies, dance, talks or anything else that's your calling, that excites you, a medium that helps you flow and that shall help others find their flow- even perhaps the way you live and love and care?!


Michelangelo has got everything to do with this! He is the one who has beyond doubt removed all doubt from my mind that the Universe, this life you and me have got is truly magical! I just finished reading his biography called "The Agony and the Ecstasy" by Irving Stone. Don't worry- it isn't only about Michelangelo's philosophy or thoughts or any self-help book for only artists- It's a biography- his life right from his birth right to his death and how he lived, what he thought and what he felt! Irving has a way with putting down these stories very humanely- stories so dehumanisingly written in history textbooks! (Aha now you see why I was ranting about history in school?)

I love Michelangelo- the person he was- how he loved and lived- how his intense love for stone guided him through and how serendipitiously he found the right people from right places at right times for his passion, his dream, his only wish to carve and share his vision of the beauty of humanity, the vision of God! It's truly magical! Gives you a perspective on your life you know? Perhaps all you require is the right state of mind to truly grasp and understand something eh? 
(I highly recommend this book to anyone who has even had a spark of interest- whenever you wish to or feel like reading it-that's most important-Don't read it if it doesn't pull you in or interest you- find another source that catches your attention and follow your instinct-it knows better!)

Here I'll share my magical story of how I found the book or rather how the book found me! I am cent percent sure that if this book had come to me any sooner or later, I wouldn't have understood and loved it as much! Guess who introduced me to Michelagnolo?

PS: I'd started this post with the intention of sharing Michelagnolo's awesome thoughts that went behind each of his work, his very human experiences just like you and me and how he struggled to never compromise his way of seeing things and how he managed! Gosh, just go on and read it lest I repeat the whole book out here! The Agony and the Ecstasy Hmm, so Irving Stone indeed used the term "biographical novel" to cover his genre of writing! Love it- a fictional narrative on the psychology of private lives of historical figures! Wow! Imagine getting into the skin of that person to be able to write what he felt and thought! SALUTE!

The Light I See

Here, in the stillness, the quiet placeWhere I'm lying with a downturn faceYou come and distract meFrom what's coming at me, ohGive me something to look forward toTruth be told, sometimes it's only youNothing is at stake hereWhen we are awake here
It's you who brings the morningAnd you who takes the sun when I sleepYou're the only one who stuck aroundFor me, when I was losingFaith in what I thought I would beYou're the only one in the dark I seeThe dark I seeThe dark I see
I know I lose my heart so easilyTry to only show the best of meAnd I go into hidingEach time I stop tryingOh, you remind of the little thingsTill, I forget the part that's troubling meAnd I feel so much betterWhen we are together
It's you who brings the morningAnd you who takes the sun when I sleepYou're the only one who stuck aroundFor me, when I was losingFaith in what I thought I would beYou're the only one in the dark I seeThe dark I seeThe dark I see
And It's you who brings the morningAnd you who takes the sun when I sleepYou're the only one who stuck aroundFor me, when I was losingFaith in what I thought I would beYou're the only one in the dark I see

Easter Zeest_er

Easter Day's here again-
To ease away all the pain!
No love's lost in no vain,
No joy nobody's gonna feign.
It's showering ze merriment rain!
So hop on to the Easter train-
Let rest awhile yer mighty brain!
Too long in darkness have ye lain,
No longer there- shall ye remain!
Cos with the Universe holding yer chariot's reign,
The World's all yours to gain-
With truth and love shinin' bright on yer lovely mane!

PS: Ye may leave a few of yer own lines, no matter how inane or insane or even sane ;-) :-)

The Strangestestest Coincidence

Hello folks! This is the story of the strangest of coincidences colliding head-on that came fully prepared to baffle me outta me wits! First, as you too must have been wary, today is 1st April- A Fool's Day! (Stating the obvious I see but anyway, I too had my guard super ready for thwarting the slightest of attempts to mar my questionable sanity.)

In the afternoon around 1 o'clock, I got a call from a landline number.
On the other end was a girl named Toral Khatri who claimed to belong to a youth group called SEGOA and asked me if I could spare a few moments to participate in one of the many experiments their group conducted.

First, I hadn't heard of any girl by that name before except that my mom used to say that she intended to name me Toral once upon a time and I actually hadn't told anyone about this.
Second, Khatri is basically my clan name so I asked her first how she got my number. She said that my cousin 'A' recommended my name.
Third, I hadn't heard about the group either but that didn't mean it didn't exist.

Surely I was suspicious that 'twas a friend just playing a prank or could be my cousin 'A' too but she didn't sound like her. I decided to play along. So I first asked her what SEGOA meant. It turns out to be "Social Experiments Group Of Anto" to which of course I say Anto must be the person who started the group? She says specifically twas Mr. Anto Fernandes who started this group and that there were 1,42,012 members already participating in this social experiment.

Now, there is this whole ANTOE deal relating to a dream I once had in which my friend S Fernandes calls me an ANTOE with that spelling exactly. Now surely I was curious no matter what and for a moment I suspected 'twas 'S' but she sounded nothing like her too!
My curiosity and a very healthy zeal for coincidences and chance encounters and Universal magic got the better of me; though mind you- My guard was still intact. I wanted to know what the whole deal was and how far one can take a prank if it was one! Also, I couldn't directly start laughing on her face assuming twas a prank 'cos what if it really was something awesome I was to be a part of? I love magical happenings! Which nut doesn't? 

So that's how I finally agreed and asked her what the experiment was about. She said that this experiment is designed to test the strength of collective energy in fulfilling individual dreams! I just have to take a piece of paper, write my deepest, truest and most heartfelt dream- something I'd like to be fulfilled. Once I do that, she asked me to visualise it to the best of my ability until I smile as if it was already fulfilled! That done, I must tear up the paper and throw it in the bin.

This seemed incredulous of course as you too might be wondering! 

I asked her how would this help the group and their experiment? She said by agreeing, I've already registered myself and that all I have to do now is go to their site and say 'yes' the day my dream is actualised!

Sounds freakishly awesome eh? Even I thought so and I saw that there wasn't anything to lose, so there was no harm in giving it a shot! Except if it was a prank, I'd be called a fool but then again, I didn't have to disclose my dream to anyone and 'twas like a silent pact, the idea of which totally appealed to me and if this was real, my dream would come true anyway!

So, still with my guard all proudly shining, I thanked her and she thanked me for listening and hung up leaving me with their Tumblr account asking me to do the activity for my own satisfaction and drop into their site on the D-day-yep, the day what I wrote got manifested!

Well, believing in the power of dreams and imagination, I did go through with this activity and now I'm all smiles with an indescribable sense of happiness surging through! You totally must try this too! It's truly magical!

Now, just looking forward to the D-day! Though I was curious to check if any of the 1,42,012 people had got their dreams fulfilled until now so I did go ahead and check the site. It's totally AWESOMAZING! You must check it out too! Here's the link:


PS: Ok, so it's 8th May, 2012 today and I'm glad to tell you that this experiment actually does work! Yeah, you guessed right- I made this whole thing up on the fool's day, but mind you- with the bestest intentions at heart! Yes, the "coincidences" are real- as real as you. No, there is no such group as SEGOA, no Toral Khatri either, but there is ME! What more do ye want eh? So go on ahead and try it. Most importantly, do not by any means forget to put a "YES" on the antoexperiments tumblr link I've provided above when your hearty happy humbly bumbly wish comes true. It'll make me verrrryyyy happyyyyy to know that it worked for you too! So, dear magical being, go on and give it a shot! Worry you must not!